Hey Bertha, you big girl’s blouse, we have been hearing all week about how you’re coming to blow all our houses down, so where’s all your puff? I’ve heard more wind after a feed in the local curry house, and as for rain, well it’s hardly damped down the summer dust. Mind you, the build-up has come mainly from the BBC crap weather service who couldn’t forecast the result of todays charity shield match tomorrow. Here I was, looking for a halfway decent gale that might uproot a few trees and smash a few bus-shelters, as well as enlarge a few potholes, but no, nothing is happening again.
Ah Bertha, where is thy sting-a-ling-a-ling!