FIVE MINUTE POEM

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a poem in five minutes; yeah, I know, it shows!

FIVE MINUTE POEM

The Holy Spirit uni-sexed

And Christ cross-dressed

The liturgical variations are endless

Perhaps Mary sporting a head-dress?

Bring back sin

Masturbation is in – again

Not that it was ever really out

It’s just that people don’t like to flout

Their little peccadilloes ad nauseam

Otherwise we could surely expect a wanking symposium.

MORE OLD MATTRESSES

OLD MATTRESSES

They have raised a highway

Across our valley

And landscaped it

With blocks of windowed concrete.

Beneath, the river strangles itself

With shopping trolleys

And bits of old bicycles

Worn-out mattresses

And smashed-up pallets are everywhere

While a bloated condom

Flutters by on a piece of driftwood.

Painted hoarding-women

With rotating eyes

Compete for attention

With pram-pushing young love,

Their stilettos tap-dancing the hard shoulder

On a clear day

Juggernauts gleam in the sun

And rolled-up tabloids

Tell tall tales about Royalty

Or football….and Sex

THE SELFIE STICK – THE WAND OF NARCISSISM

I POSTED THIS POEM BEFORE BUT WITH THE CONTINUED POPULARITY OF THE SELFIE STICK I THINK IT IS WORTH ANOTHER POST. (WITH CONTINUED APOLOGIES TO IAN DURY AND THE BLOCKHEADS)

THE WAND OF NARCISSISM

In the deserts of Sudan

And the gardens of Japan

From Milan to Yucatan

Every woman, every man

Hit me with your selfie stick
Hit me, hit me
hit me now you selfish prick
Hit me, hit me, hit me
Hit me with your stupid stick
Hit me slowly, hit me quick
Hit me, hit me, hit me

With your stupid fucking selfie stick

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THE KISS by Stephen Edgar

Stephen Edgar has always been a favourite poet of mine. Born in Sydney in 1951 he spent a number of years in London, forming a friendship with fellow Australian poet Clive James, before returning home. This is a fine poem, as is Man In The Moon.

THE KISS

How can she do this now that it’s all changed,
Present her lips to kiss
As though that known face were the same as this
From which you’ve been estranged?
Of course it is. Here, now? Or then and there?
How can she sit down in her cloud of hair

And watch you as though you were someone else?
You are, of course, to her.
You were this rendezvous’s commissioner
And nobody compels
Your self-distressed attendance here but you.
So watch her do as only she can do.

She lifts her left hand to her left earlobe
And tugs the earring, slides
The hook half out and rubs at it and glides
It in, as its purple globe
Swings back and forth to tantalize your sight.
Soon she will do the same thing with the right.

A silver bracelet rides along one arm
Or settles at the wrist,
And lest adornment should seem prejudiced
The other has its charm
As well, made somehow perfect by the dent
That mars the curve of its encirclement.

And those two combs holding her hair in place,
Two combs of tortoiseshell—
And when she took them out, oh how it fell
At night around her face,
Which she would lift to you and shut her eyes,
That beauty come to seem beauty’s disguise,

And whether by desire or candlelight,
Her skin took on a glow,
An alabaster lucency, and so
She leant back to invite
Your open-mouthed assent. And you would hold
That pose like two Klimt lovers cloaked in gold.

And that first night you slid the purple shift
Over her shoulders and
Peeled gently downwards, leaving her to stand
In Aphrodite’s gift,
And sinking with her garment to the floor,
Made moist the shadowed fold you knelt before.

How can she do this now that you’re estranged,
Stand in her cloud of hair
As though she were the same, though well aware
That everything is changed
(Of course she is), presenting for your kiss
The mouth that was the mouth that is not this.

CLUBBED BY KINDNESS

CLUBBED BY KINDNESS
Clubbed by kindness
I sit here stunned
By the knowledge that
You loved me once
Possibly.
No room for any doubt on my side
But you were forbidden fruit
About to fall from the tree
Trouble was
I never tried to catch you
Not really.
And now I have fallen further
Than you ever could
And there you are
Somehow
To pick me up

PEARL ENCRUSTED GATES

PEARL ENCRUSTED GATES

It’s the waiting you see

For something to happen

Or not, as the case may be

This limbo life limps on

Nothing changes

But another day gone

Maybe tomorrow I’ll wake

Without a new ache

And think – ah nothing’s wrong

But the delusion persists,

Or is it illusion?

That a mighty fall awaits

Outside these pearl encrusted gates

FROM THE WORD MUSEUM

FROM THE WORD MUSEUM1524898_641076452617785_515751935_n

Shivelat’s-hen

Shammocking dog

Shanks’- pony

Shuttle-gathering

Ramfeezled

Raw-gabbit

Redder’s lick

Rattle-bladder

Puke-stocking

Pulpitarian

Postillion

Pseudologer

Pizzle-grease

Pismire

EVEN IF I HAD NO HANDS

LOOK, NO HANDS

Even if I had no hands

I would be ambidextrous

Ac-dc in a strange sort of way

Though women would still be kings

Or should that be queens?

Even if I had no legs

I would still walk tall

Play legless football

If the fancy took me,

Roller-skate differently, that’s all

Even if I had no mouth

I would still speak out

Words would continue to pour forth

I would not be silenced

I would speak from the heart

Even if I had no eyes

I would still see plenty

Believing would be seeing

And if only in my mind’s eye

My vision would still be twenty-twenty

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JESUS FREAKS

JESUS FREAKS

Jesus on the streets

Satan under the sheets

Why do the heathens rage

When we don’t keep sinners in a cage?

He that sits in the heavens shall laugh

When he speaks to them in his wrath

Hear me when I call, ye sons of men

How long before ye turn glory into shame again?

Stand ye in awe and sin not one time more

For your pillow will be a hard rock

And your bed a fiery brimstone floor.

THE END OF THE WORLD IS NEIGH

sunset-birds

THE END OF THE WORLD IS NEIGH

The end of the world is neigh
Said the sandwich-board vendor
The word is ‘nigh’ my friend, I replied
And anyway it’s not due until next November.
We’re all cowboys on this burnt out lump in space
Searching for a spark in the dying embers
The world has already ended many times
The latest one was in the dog days of last December.